No One Cares

 Everyone is sick of how complicated I am, and of taking me to the ER, and dealing with my reactions.

No one gives a damn about how I feel. 

No one stops for a fucking minute to consider how hard this is on me both physically and mentally.   How hard it is to live not only in fear of another reaction, but also of people's anger because of it.  


I hate having to depend on people to do my shopping, take me to the doctor and ER and wherever else I get to go -  just in case I end up in the ER.   I'm sick of it.  I feel like no one cares to even try to understand.  

No one cares about leaving me alone in the ER while I'm fighting the reactions. They don't even want to understand how lonely it is for me.   They seem to think that just because it happens so frequently I should be used to it and it's no big deal.  

They're wrong.  It's ALWAYS scary and lonely and each one is harder to deal with. I want someone to stay with me and advocate for me and calm me down and help me handle it. 

  Instead, they're worried about the time they're wasting and how hard it is on them. 

What about me?  What kind of a life is this?  Will anyone EVER love me for me, or will I spend the rest of my life alone and too much?

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